As you may have noticed, the dawn of 2009 has seen me take a slightly less hands-on approach to posting - I've been learning plenty of new stuff, but haven't summoned the spirit to render it into something readable. Instead of becoming the billionth person to apologise for not writing a blog entry for 3 months, I'll press on as I have facts spewing forth from every inch of grey matter I possess. Maybe not every inch.
Anyway, the presence of the veritable fact mountain I've been stockpiling, like grain in a massive barn in Switzerland, has got me thinking - why do I do this to myself? From whence my love of trivial nonsense, to the extent that I spend my life racing around with a large metaphorical fact-net, trying to scoop them up and regurgitate them onto a bemused and indifferent public? Two words - Trivial Pursuit. The giddy thrill of a four-cheese streak. The horror of landing on the central victory podium, a full set o' cheeses glinting in the afternoon sun, only to fall at the last hurdle and spend another half an hour frantically trying to return, all in vain.
Trivial Pursuit is the best game ever, and I think it's what first turned me on to the irresistible glow of pride and achievement gained from knowing things nobody needs to know. In TP, this pointless knowledge makes you a champion. If only it were so in real life. And so, in an earnest homage to the world's finest board game, and in no way a barely concealed attempt to dump large chunks of my fact fountain into barely discernible categories, I begin at the beginning, with 12 questions on the blue cheese, Geography (my favourite TP topic - a specialist subject, no unwelcome surprises like Sport & Leisure). Answers below - try your luck, punks.
1. Which invented language is still spoken natively by thousands of people?
2. What is unique about the nations Liechtenstein and Uzbekistan?
3. Where in the world is Bedlam?
4. How many nations form the G20 economic group?
5. What is the capital of Alaska?
6. Which Latin American capital city was originally built on volcanic lakes?
7. True or false: Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch was given it's stupid and long name to attract tourists to the village.
8. Which German city was built in 1938 to house workers at the nearby VW plant?
9. Which is the only London Underground line to intersect with all other lines?
10. Which country on Earth is furthest from any ocean or sea?
And now it's answers time. I used to love reading the answers - by now you can probably imagine what an insufferable little turd I must have been, gleefully informing people of their slight inaccuracy and snatching the dice from their disbelieving hands:
1. Esperanto - those who learnt the language and married a fellow Esperanto speaker, who presumably they met at an Esparanto-based event, taught it to their children, who have now grown up as Esperanto speakers.
2. They are the only two nations on Earth to be doubly landlocked - this means that they are not only landlocked themselves, but border only other landlocked countries.
3. Bedlam was the name given to Bethlehem Hospital in Lambeth, South London. It is now a military museum.
4. Nineteen. Someone forgot to turn up.
5. Juneau.
6. Mexico City.
7. True - the name was made up in the 19th century to attract tourism to the otherwise unremarkable area.
8. Wolfsburg, in the central Saxony region, was founded to provide homes for a new car plant, and was originally named, slightly less romantically, Stadt des KdF-Wagens by the Nazis, who admittedly are not renowned for their sense of romance.
9. The Jubilee line, following an extension in 1999 which took it from Green Park to Stratford. A little bit of extra info thrown in, in what I like to call a 'Chris from Eggheads' manouevre.
10. Kyrgyzstan, in Central Asia.
Next up is Entertainment... hopefully soon.
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