Anthropomorphism

<< Anthropomorphism at it's finest

The above is now my new favourite word (replacing 'poo' after an impressive 22-year run) and it means this:

Anthropomorphism is the term given to the application of uniquely human characteristics to nonhuman beings, objects or other phenomena.

Some examples - non-human being, Bugs Bunny. Object - Thomas the Tank Engine. Phenomena - um, Casper the Friendly Ghost? The worst example of this would have to be those pet rescue ads where Neil Morrissey tells us how, in a previous life where he was a greyhound, he felt betrayed when his owner left him, feels he has love to give and 'knows he's a good dog'. Unless Mozza is interpreting this through his new-found sentience as a human being, he's wrong. Dogs really don't know whether they're good or bad. People will say I'm being cruel, but if you have to give a hungry, sick and caged animal human emotions in order to feel sorry for it, then shame on you.

You may be wondering why I chanced upon this definition - well, it relates to the mice that are loose aboot this hoose. Forgive me for lapsing into the dull minutae of my actual life for a moment, but I bought some glue traps in the pound shop as it said they were 'humane' - sadly for Mr. Mouse, it turns out they're the rodent equivalent of the final scene in Saw. It is, thankfully, possible to remove any stuck critters who haven't chewed their legs off and then release them into the wild. My concern was that they would then round up their furry friends and return to my house in numbers, as some kind of revenge mission.

So, I wondered, do animals understand the concept of vengeance? I felt sure that some animals do (although I imagined that didn't include mice) but it appears that I was wrong. There are theories being mooted about elephants and killer whales killing to mend past wrongs, but really it's a ridiculous idea, and a perfect example of how we apply human characteristics to animals all too readily. I'm sure I've seen nature programmes where lion cubs have been attacked, supposedly because of the misdemeanours of their parents. Most 'experts' seem to think that animals are not capable of this kind of thinking, but maybe they just believe that the best revenge is living well. Someone has to. So don't worry, you can turn over those RSPCA ads, the dog won't come after you when he's out of the clink. Or will he...